The Foundation of a Successful Athlete Mentality
I’m going to do something I rarely do as a therapist – speak in an absolute. So, lean in, and listen up – the most important advice that I can give an athlete is to “control the controllables.” Granted, this absolute is much easier said than done. However, I think this is the foundation of a successful athlete’s mentality. Start here, and all else will follow.
In graduate school, I learned quickly that absolutes are rare in psychology. When I first started seeing therapy clients, I wanted to be as prepared as possible for each session. My ability to study and memorize was one of my strengths in high school and college. Typically, the more I studied, the better I would do. Leaning on this previously successful strategy, I would ask my new supervisors all sorts of questions (“What would be the best way to approach…”, “What is the best intervention for…?”). The answer I got with frustratingly regularity was, “It depends.” I realized quickly that memorizing was not helpful as a therapist. If anything, it was harmful. What works for one client will not necessarily work for another client. I could spend a morning preparing for a client based on what we talked about in the previous session, excited to share my new interpretation that surely will help us get to the bottom of their concerns, only for them to bring up something entirely different in our next session. Therapy is human engagement. And humans are unique and complex.
I eventually came to grips with “it depends,” even embraced it. It made sessions much more dynamic, much more human. I found that I myself began to respond to my clients’ questions (“What should I do if my spouse does...?” or “How can I decrease my…?”) with this answer – these types of questions almost always require further examination and individual tailoring. However, I was recently asked by a high school student what was the single most helpful thing an athlete can do to improve their mentality. I reflexively offered my psychology answer – “it depends.” Then, I briefly described the four main sport psychology tools that an athlete could utilize depending on the situation: goal-setting, imagery, self-talk, and relaxation/energization techniques. Upon further reflection, though, I believe there is a place to start for any athlete and for any concern – which just might make it the “single most helpful thing.” To improve one’s mentality, an athlete needs to focus on what that athlete, and only that athlete, can control.
To explain this idea, I will start with its inverse – letting go of what one cannot control. There are many factors in athletes’ lives that are out of their control, but that are admittedly difficult to not pay attention to. These factors include referee calls, coaching decisions, the quality of the other team, the weather, etc. I dare to offer another absolute here – any energy spent on worrying about these components is wasted energy.
For example, getting upset about a refereeing decision – what good can come from this? It distracts athletes from their own performance at best, antagonizing the referee to make biased calls in the future at worst. I am sure most athletes can relate to the feeling that they got too upset at an official, and it took away their focus from their own performance. Referees are human and they are going to make mistakes. Limiting mistakes for an athlete is hard enough – that’s where an athlete’s focus should be rather than attempting to correct the inevitable mistakes of an official.
Another example is the amount of time athletes spend stressing about various coaching decisions (“Will I make the team?”, “Will I start?”). And understandably so – much time and effort go into playing sports, and we want it to pay off. However, a player thinking about what a coach might decide does not help realize that pay-off. In the end, the coach is going to decide what they think is best for the team. When doing that, they may prefer a style of play that prioritizes certain types of players. They may have a bias about the size of an athlete based on their own experience. Basically, they bring in their own “stuff.” An athlete can only focus on doing their job of playing at their best. Do what they can to impress their coach and feel grounded in that because that is all they can do.
Now back to the controllables. In examining the four tools that I listed earlier (goal-setting, imagery, self-talk, and relaxation/energization techniques), they all have foundational components of focusing energy into what the athlete can control.
Goal Setting: In terms of goal-setting, I often discuss with athletes the difference between process goals and outcome goals. An outcome goal focuses on the end result of an endeavor, whether it is a single performance or across an entire season. Examples of outcome goals include scoring a certain number of points in a basketball game or winning the championship. These can be important goals to set, but the thing about outcome goals is that they are contingent upon many other factors besides what is in the athlete’s control. Another team might have an historically good season and end up winning the championship. Poor officiating might cause a player to foul out of a basketball game before that player can reach their points goal. A process goal, on the other hand, is entirely in the individual athlete’s control, such as effort, attitude, and technique. Examples of process goals include spending extra time in the weight room or using the correct technique when swinging a baseball bat. Regardless of the quality of the pitcher, the batter can stay consistent with the correct technique. Process goals thus serve as the foundation for outcome goals. By accomplishing process goals, athletes are more likely to accomplish their outcome goals. And this can also increase confidence as athletes check off what they set out to do. And as confidence increases, motivation to continue setting goals and improving also increases.
Imagery: When using imagery, athletes are literally controlling situations in their mind, whether that is rehearsing a particular skill to increase competence or replaying a previous peak performance to increase confidence. By visualizing a skill or a play, an athlete might have better control over it, especially when an athlete is still learning that skill or play, if they are injured and cannot practice, or if they are wanting to make use of time traveling to their competition/practice. One of the mechanisms behind imagery is that imagining a certain action utilizes the same neural pathways as actually performing the action itself. These neural pathways do not fire as strongly, so while a mental rep is still beneficial, it is not as impactful as a physical rep.
Self-Talk: Something an athlete said once that has always stuck with me underscores the important connection between self-talk and control. This athlete said that the turning point of their career was when they learned to talk to themself rather than listen to themself. Our brains are problem-solving machines, naturally drawn to potential threats or issues that need fixing. As a result, many athletes’ self-talk (i.e., their inner dialogue) leans towards the negative (e.g., what they should have done on the last play, doubts about the next play). However, our brain can be trained just like a muscle. We do not have to just sit and listen to our mind tell us everything that we did wrong. Instead, we can be intentional and talk back to our brain, focusing our thoughts on what is helpful rather than what bring us down. Studies show that people who think that they are going to succeed at something compared to those who think that they will fail are typically more successful.
Relaxation/energization techniques: Relaxation/energization techniques are all about recognizing your current mental and physical state and deciding whether it will be helpful for performance. If not, then there are strategies to help shift those states! Many athletes struggle with nerves before a game, which often results in physiological symptoms such as elevated heart rate and shallow breathing. We have the power to respond to these symptoms rather than just put up with them and hope for the best. Diaphragmatic breathing is a great example of this. With the right practice and technique, we can control our breathing. Through concentrating on our breath, we can work to relax our body and mind.
As I wrote at the beginning, all of this is easier said than done. To actually implement the idea of controlling the controllables, it takes practice – a lot of practice. And how that looks is going to be different for each person. See – we’re getting into “it depends” territory here. And once we get into this territory, one of the best ways to figure out what it looks like for you is to meet with a sport psychologist!
To start sport therapy in Dallas, TX, follow these steps:
1. Contact Sunrise Counseling
2. Meet with one of our caring therapists that specializes in sport psychology
3. Begin focusing on the controllables and improve your mentality as an athlete!
Other Mental Health Services in Dallas, TX
Sport Psychology is only one of the mental health services we offer at Sunrise Counseling. We provide a variety of services to clients from our Dallas TX-based therapy office and the surrounding areas. Other mental health services we provide at Sunrise Counseling include: