Understanding Parental Concerns About School Shootings

In recent years, school shootings have become an alarming reality for many families, leading to heightened anxiety and fear among parents. When I interviewed several mothers, common sentiments emerged: a profound sense of anger and confusion over why these tragedies are occurring, coupled with the heartbreaking responsibility of teaching their children how to stay safe in a place that should be nurturing and secure.

Key Concerns Parents Expressed

Why Is This Happening?
Many parents struggle to understand the root causes of school violence. The unpredictability of such events creates a sense of helplessness and frustration. Parents often grapple with the question, "Why do we have to prepare our children for something so horrific?"

Anger at the Situation
There’s a deep-seated anger among parents about having to educate their children on safety protocols instead of allowing them to focus on learning and socializing. This anger can be directed towards the system, the media, or broader societal issues that contribute to violence.

Daily Worry and Anxiety
For many parents, the daily act of dropping their children off at school is fraught with anxiety. The question of "What if today is the day?" looms large, impacting their mental well-being and making it difficult to fully engage in their day-to-day lives.

Strategies to Help Parents Manage Stress

Here are some strategies that may help parents manage their stress. Remember, it takes time and practice, and not all methods will resonate with everyone, but these approaches can provide some relief:

Open Communication
As a parent, talk openly with your children about their feelings. Creating a space for dialogue can help both parents and children process their emotions together.

Educate About Safety
Providing children with age-appropriate information about safety procedures can empower them and reduce anxiety. As parents you can work with schools to understand their emergency protocols, fostering a sense of security.

Mindfulness Practices
Use mindfulness and relaxation techniques to help manage your own stress. Mindfulness is a state of active, open attention to the present in the here and now.  Practices like deep breathing, meditation, or yoga can help in grounding  yourself and reducing anxiety.

Limit Media Exposure
Monitor your own and your children's exposure to news about school shootings. Constant news cycles can amplify fear and anxiety, so finding a balance is crucial.

Support Networks
Try local or online support groups where you can share your experiences and feelings. Knowing you are not alone can provide comfort and solidarity.

Focus on What Can Be Controlled
Try to focus on aspects of school safety you can influence, such as advocating for better security measures or getting involved in school committees that address safety concerns.

Seek Professional Help
If anxiety becomes overwhelming, consider seeking support from mental health professionals. Therapy can provide coping strategies and a safe space to explore your fears.

Talk Through A Plan with Your Child

I understand that the thought of creating safety strategies for your children can feel daunting and overwhelming. However, developing a strategy plan together can empower them and help alleviate anxiety about school safety. Here’s some things that could help in creating a plan collaboratively:

Open the Conversation
Start by having an open discussion about safety at school. Ask your child how they feel about school and if they have any worries. Validate their feelings and let them know it’s okay to talk about these concerns.

Identify Safety Procedures
Research and discuss the safety protocols in place at your child’s school. This might include lockdown procedures, emergency exits, and how teachers will respond in a crisis. Understanding these procedures can help demystify them and reduce anxiety.

Create a Safety Plan
Work together to create a simple safety plan, which could include:

Meeting Points: Identify safe places to go in case of an emergency (like a nearby park or a friend’s house).

Emergency Contacts: Make a list of important phone numbers, including family members, friends, and trusted adults.

Code Words: Establish a code word that you and your child can use if they feel unsafe or need to reach you urgently.

Practice Drills
Consider practicing your safety plan together. Role-playing different scenarios can help your child feel more confident and prepared. Make it a constructive and reassuring experience rather than a source of fear.

Encourage Problem-Solving
Discuss potential scenarios and encourage your child to think about how they would respond. This helps them develop problem-solving skills and fosters a sense of agency.

Reinforce Positivity
Emphasize that schools are generally safe places and that many people work hard to keep them that way. Encourage your child to focus on the positive aspects of school, such as friendships and learning opportunities.

Check-In Regularly
Make it a habit to check in with your child about their feelings regarding school safety. Encourage ongoing dialogue so they feel comfortable sharing any new concerns or anxieties.

Seek Support if Needed
If your child feels anxious about school safety, consider seeking support from school counselors or mental health professionals who can provide additional resources and coping strategies.

Conclusion

While the fear of school shootings is a harsh reality for many parents, fostering resilience in children and maintaining open lines of communication can help alleviate some of that stress. By creating a supportive environment and focusing on proactive measures, parents can help themselves and their children navigate these challenging times together. Working together to create a safety strategy plan not only empowers children but also builds confidence and fosters a sense of security in an uncertain world.

If you or your child are experiencing anxiety or stress regarding school violence and would like more help, one of our therapists at Sunrise Counseling can help.

1.    Contact Sunrise Counseling 

2.    Meet with one of our caring therapists

Mental Health Services at Sunrise Counseling in Dallas, TX 

Sunrise Counseling offers a variety of other mental health services in our Dallas TX-based therapy office and offers telehealth therapy to those residing in Texas. Mental health services we provide at Sunrise Counseling include: